I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
This toilet bowl is my home.
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