What a fucking waste of an outfit
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
