used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
