then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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