The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Randomize
