If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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