i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize