Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
