I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
