wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
my liver is dry heaving
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
