He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
