Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Houston, we have a blender
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
