So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
