WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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