Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
