I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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