Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
