If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
