Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
