the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
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