There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
