Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
