watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
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