Where did you get a picture of my penis
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize