No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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