Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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