I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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