or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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