you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
