Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I am naked and annoyed.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
