Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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