Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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