do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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