This girl is more easily done than said...
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize