just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
