I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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