We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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