Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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