i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
