And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
