Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize