When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
nutella sex= disaster
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
The feeling are messing with the penis
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize