Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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