So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I don't deserve a penis
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
It was a blind-side dick pic.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
