I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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