I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
