haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
