When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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