Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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