Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize