i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
